Random questions in my head

Thursday

Random questions in my head

Today I reminisce about the men that I have loved in my life. They are all different people and I love them differently. Besides all the difference one thing remained the same, one characteristic that they all share in common. No, its not that they all adore me and love me with all their heart.. They were all men that I know deep down I would not spend my life with.

People say when you meet the one, you know.. but when I cannot even decide on the right pair of shoes, how do I decide on the “right” one?

In my life, things come unexpectedly in my life, and I follow the course, with nothing more than just hope. 

I “accidently” fall into my career path, I accidentally fell in love and by chance I manage to fulfill my childhood dreams, which is to travel. 

Sometimes it made me wonder, “Am I just settling for whatever that I can get?”

Or

Is it the fact that when growing up, I learn that the best way to not let yourself down, is to never expect too much. Manage your expectations. The less you hope for, no matter what you get, you get content. Growing up, I never asked for specifics. I make it open with much space for consolation. See, I never wished to be married, be a mother and be happy. Instead I wish to be once in my life, know what it is to fall in love and have someone to love you back. Love with passion, love with all your heart.. the kind of stupid love you read in those trashy romance novels. And I have experienced that kind of love and the heartbreak that comes with it. The kind of love, that shakes you to the core.

Then, all I ever wanted was, to be able to travel (again without any specifics). And when I fall in love, I happen to fall in love with someone who made that possible for me (due to the long distance relationship). And eh.. I kill two birds with one stone.

So if both of my dreams are fulfilled, what else is there to look forward to…